Applied to join the Police last week but wasn’t successful. To be fair I didn’t know all the words to Roxanne.

Chinese proverb: Man run behind bus get exhausted man run in front of bus gets tired.  

My bank are a bunch of cheeky gits. They phoned to see if my debit card has been stolen as there was an unusual transaction. I had bought a gym membership.

What’s a bachelor? Someone who never Mrs. anyone.

Why don’t you tell jokes to ducks? They’ll quack up.