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mwak! mwak!

A repository for whats on my mind at any given time. Probably should be sealed in concrete and dumped in the ocean.

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  • Category: shopping

  • A couple wrapped in a barcode…

    Posted by Simon Harvey on 18 December 2017

    I was in the supermarket yesterday and I saw a man and woman wrapped up in a barcode. I said “Are you an item?”

    dad jokes, humour, shopping, wordplay
  • Just got banned from Bunnings.

    Posted by Simon Harvey on 26 October 2017

    Just got banned from Bunnings. Bloke dressed in green and red came up to me and asked if I wanted decking. I was able to get the first punch in though.

    australia, dad jokes, humour, shopping, sport, wordplay
  • Got into a fight at Bunnings at the weekend.

    Posted by Simon Harvey on 26 October 2017

    Got into a fight at Bunnings at the weekend. It was pretty close, but I beat him by 10%.

    australia, dad jokes, humour, shopping
  • Why does the man want to buy nine racquets?

    Posted by Simon Harvey on 24 October 201724 October 2017

    Why does the man want to buy nine racquets? Because tennis too many.

    dad jokes, humour, shopping, sport, wordplay
  • My local pet shop must have a sale on.

    Posted by Simon Harvey on 17 October 2017

    My local pet shop must have a sale on. As I walked past, the budgies were going cheep.

    animals, dad jokes, humour, shopping, wordplay
  • Coleslaw

    Posted by Simon Harvey on 5 October 2017

    Yesterday I went to the supermarket to buy cabbage.  There’s a new law that if you buy cabbage from Coles, you’re legally required to purchase carrots and mayonnaise as well. Its Coles Law.

    australia, dad jokes, food, shopping, wordplay
  • Banned from Woolworths…

    Posted by Simon Harvey on 18 September 201720 September 2017

    Yesterday I was at my local Woolworths store buying a large bag of My Dog for my loyal pet; I was in the checkout queue when a woman behind me asked if I had a …

    dad jokes, it, jokes, shopping
  • That’s the last time …

    Posted by Simon Harvey on 18 September 2017

    ˙ʎɐqə uo pɹɐoqʎəʞ dɐəɥɔ ɐ ʎnq ı əɯıʇ ʇsɐl əɥʇ s’ʇɐɥʇ

    dad jokes, it, shopping
  • My daughter wanted a pet spider…

    Posted by Simon Harvey on 18 September 2017

    My daughter wanted a pet spider but they were $90 at the pet shop. I think I will just get one off the web.

    animals, dad jokes, shopping, wordplay
  • There was a big paddle sale at the boat shop.

    Posted by Simon Harvey on 13 September 2017

    There was a big paddle sale at the boat shop. It was quite an oar deal.

    dad jokes, shopping, wordplay
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