More girls chase after me than most Hollywood celebrities. I am a terrible bus driver and never make the right stops.
Dad Jokes
Hangman
A hangman works under a tight deadline.
Big Headed
I don’t want to sound big-headed, but I can’t get my jumper off.
Tax Time
What happens if you tell the ATO to get stuffed? Taxidermy.
Coffee
I was just talking to someone who regularly spends a very large amount on coffee. I don’t know how he sleeps at night.
Telstra & Optus
Telstra and Optus have confirmed that they will be getting married. There will be no reception.
New ABBA Album!
ABBA’s New Album Tracklist: Where’s The Loo Infirmando Gimme Gimme Gimme (a Milo Before Midnight) Knowing Me, Forgetting You Shuffling Queen The Winner Takes A Fall Super Pooper SOS Mama Mia (I Gotta Go Again) Take A Crap For Me… Read More ›
Boomerang factory
I used to work in a boomerang factory. In the Returns Department.
Spelling mistakes
I hate spelling mistakes! You mix up just two letters and your whole joke is urined.
Tennis court lady
What do you call a woman laying in the middle of a tennis court? Annette!