Just spotted Sinead O’Connor bird-watching. I asked how she was getting on. She said, “so far it’s been 7 owls and 15 jays”.
Animals
Victorian Lobsters
Where do Victorian Lobsters catch their trains from? Southern Crustacean!
Natural Petrol
My car runs on ferrets but I’ve accidentally filled it with weasel.
Jungle painkillers
So why is there no aspirin in the jungle? Because the parrots-ate-them-all.
Falconry Displays
What idiot called them falconry displays and not hawk/kestrel manoeuvres in the park?
Swimming with dolphins
If you thought swimming with dolphins was expensive, try swimming with sharks. Cost me an arm and a leg.
Fish communication
What is the best way to communicate with a fish? Drop it a line! (For reel!)
Escargot
[The Ark Day 1] NOAH: OK lions you’re in L CARGO bears you’re in B CARGO and snails you’re in S CARGO. SNAIL: Very funny, smart arse.