Author Archives
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Birthday Present
Bought my wife a high powered fan for her birthday. She was blown away.
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ScoMo has been hit by a rotten egg.
ScoMo has been hit with a rotten egg. The AFP have been scrambled, whilst the Australian people are said to be eggstatic.
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Maths
Whilst most puns make me feel numb, mathematics puns make me feel number.
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Acromegaly, the Shrek Condition – My story. [Part 3: Brain Injury – Dark Cloud, Silver Lining]
My apologies for the delay in writing this update. As you’ll see, its quite a difficult post to write, and this is my third attempt, after aborting and doing something less distressful. Like killing some pigs on Angry Birds. The first part is based upon my understanding of what happened, and the remainder is based …
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Telstra Time
The Telstra guy just stopped me in the street and asked me the time. I said “yeah mate it’s sometime between 7am and 6pm” and walked off.
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Victorian Lobsters
Where do Victorian Lobsters catch their trains from? Southern Crustacean!
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Confucius on church
Confucius say: “Man who fart in church sit in own pew”.
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A Little Respect
My neighbours kept banging on my wall while I’m trying to listen to music. “A little respect please!”, they shouted. I replied, “I’m not a big Erasure fan … but ok, this one’s for you!”
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Donald Trump’s Whoppers
Donald Trump just went into Burger King and asked for two whoopers. The bloke serving said “You’re a very intelligent man and the best President we have ever had”.
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Water Bed
Can you make a water bed more bouncy by using spring water?